Marriage is one of God’s most beautiful gifts—a sacred covenant that reflects His love, commitment, and faithfulness. But like anything valuable, it takes work, intentionality, and a foundation built on God’s Word. Whether you’ve been married for decades or are just beginning your journey, these “10 Commandments” offer biblical guidance and practical wisdom to help you thrive in your marriage.
1. Thou Shalt Put God First
Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us that “a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” A strong marriage is not just about two people—it’s about two people and God. Jesus affirmed this in Matthew 19:4-6, declaring that “the two shall become one flesh… What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” God must remain at the center if our marriages are to flourish.
A healthy marriage starts with a shared commitment to put God first. Pray together. Worship together. Serve together. Study Scripture together. As Jesus taught in Matthew 6:33, “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” When God is at the center, everything else finds its rightful place.
2. Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery
This commandment from Exodus still holds true. Guard your marriage by walking in wisdom. Set healthy boundaries, avoid inappropriate conversations with the opposite sex, and refrain from sharing private marital issues outside the covenant of your relationship. Adultery doesn’t just damage trust, it harms your spouse, your children, your church, your witness, and your relationship with God. Sin is forgivable, but it carries consequences. Protect what God has entrusted to you.
3. Thou Shalt Prioritize One Another
Life gets busy. Between careers, parenting, and responsibilities, it’s easy to drift apart. Strong marriages don’t happen by accident. They’re built on intention. Prioritize your spouse through shared Bible studies, marriage conferences, or simply by listening to uplifting content together. Consider counseling not as a sign of failure, but as a commitment to growth.
4. Thou Shalt Communicate Well
Healthy communication is essential. Set aside regular time to talk, whether that’s through a weekly meeting or scheduled check-ins. Use tools like shared calendars to stay on the same page. When conflict arises—and it will—handle it with grace. Avoid name-calling, yelling, or dredging up past wounds. Speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), and remember that disagreements are opportunities to grow together.
5. Thou Shalt Not Speak Ill of Thy Spouse
Words hold power. Proverbs 18:21 reminds us that “the tongue has the power of life and death.” Choose to speak life over your spouse. Build them up in public and in private. Never use your words to wound or belittle. If you need to vent, bring your concerns to the Lord in prayer, not to gossip or complaint.
6. Thou Shalt Not Hold Grudges
Forgiveness is essential to any thriving marriage. Even the most faithful spouse will eventually disappoint you. Don’t let bitterness take root. Be quick to forgive, quick to apologize, and quick to extend grace. As Ephesians 4:32 teaches, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Life is too short to live angry or resentful.
7. Thou Shalt Keep Having Fun
Marriage isn’t meant to be endured, it’s meant to be enjoyed. Go on dates. Travel. Laugh together. Studies show that couples who have fun together report higher satisfaction and deeper connection. Don’t let your relationship become all business. Prioritize joy and lightheartedness, and schedule time to simply enjoy one another.
8. Thou Shalt Manage Money Wisely
Financial conflict is one of the leading causes of marital stress. Steward your resources well. Create a budget. Live within your means. Save for emergencies. Make big financial decisions together. Proverbs 27:23 encourages us to “know well the condition of your flocks”—a reminder that wise management honors God and protects your marriage.
9. Thou Shalt Aim to Outlove One Another
In marriage, love should never be passive. Strive to “outlove” your spouse daily. Encourage one another, serve one another, and go the extra mile. Use the five love languages—words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, acts of service, and gifts—as tools to love in ways that truly resonate. This kind of mutual pursuit strengthens your bond and reflects Christlike love.
10. Thou Shalt Not Forget Thy Vows
Marriage vows are more than poetic words. They are sacred promises made before God. “To have and to hold… for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health… till death do us part.” Recommit to those promises daily. Honor the covenant you made, not only when it’s easy, but especially when it’s hard.
Marriage is a journey of sanctification, service, and joy. It requires humility, grace, and an unwavering commitment to love like Jesus. Whether you’re newly married or celebrating decades together, may these commandments serve as a roadmap to a relationship that glorifies God and blesses everyone around you.
“What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” —Matthew 19:6
